Tag Archives: appreciation

Just checking in…

1 Apr

It’s been a while since I wrote a new post. I’ve been a little busy on another writing project – not an excuse, but just sayin’…

I am adjusting to life in a small town, Kingman Arizona. It’s not Columbus and whether you believe it or not, I MISS Ohio. As a native Michigander, I never thought I’d hear myself say that, but it’s true!

I moved to Cleveland in 1977 to attend graduate studies at Case Western Reserve University. The school is known for its Medical School, Engineering, Law, etc…I graduated from the 3-year pre-professional acting program with an M.F.A in Acting. The program at that time was a rival of Yale’s 3 year program and we were taught by all professional Equity Actors from the Cleveland Play House! It was an outstanding experience!

I became involved with The Learning Center for Human Development, a global humanitarian organization, and began a journey I’m still on today – almost 30 years later! I have had the privilege of participating in many projects to benefit others. Our recent focus has been to help raise awareness and reduce human trafficking, and we’re seeing successful results.

I helped to build a beautiful conference and retreat center in south-eastern Ohio, along with volunteers from all parts of the U.S., Canada, and countries on every continent around the globe! We worked, we laughed, we learned…it was a glorious time in my life that I truly treasure. Many of those people are still close friends today, and some I am working with in Arizona and Ohio on continued projects.

I met and began to study with LCFHD’s Founder, Pa’Ris’Ha Taylor. She has been and remains today my Traditional Elder, Business /coach and Mentor, and perpetual inspiration to always be the best I can be. I invited into that relationship – I asked her to be a reflection, no bull, no sugar-coating, to help me become my best. I could not have asked for a better experience. Like most successful coaches, she has challenged me, believed in me and celebrated my successes. She has helped me to “fail forward” through my blunders and helped me to develop my leadership capabilities. Out of respect, I call her “Grandmother.”

I spent 16 years living in Summerfield, Ohio, at Friendship Village International Retreat and Conference Center. I was, and is, a magnificent place where I met many people from all over the world, as we were building, and then those who came to enjoy the fruits of our labors. It was built all with volunteer funds and labor – most of us didn’t know squat about construction, but we learned!

I moved to Columbus Ohio in 2009 to take care of some financial and personal matters that needed handling. I found a local studio and recorded a single of my original song “Because You Believe.” I had already been active in the recovery community there and the move helped me strengthen those bonds and further my growth. Trouble is when you finally let the walls down and invest yourself in others, allowing them in…it hurts like hell when you have to move on.

So that’s where it’s at right now. I am in a new adventure, but I also miss the comfort of the known and familiar, and I miss my friends. thankfully, we have FaceBook, where I keep in touch with many from back in Columbus!

When I get really homesick for snow, I can drive to Flagstaff – and I plan to! In the meantime, I am taking it a day at a time here, furthering my education in business management and personal development, making new friends in the recovery community here and appreciating the many opportunities that come my way every day to be of service and connect with others.

Thanks for listening!
©2015 Deborah Adler and Silverstream Corporation. All rights reserved. (NOTE: ALL quotes and/or materials from other authors or sources remain the sole property of the original authors/source.)

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Welcome Home Vietnam Vets

31 Mar

Veterans_2

Sunday, March 30th, 2015, a small group of people gathered at the Kingman AZ Veterans Memorial Park to commemorate the 50th Anniversary of Vietnam War and honor those who served.

I got there late because of work, but got the opportunity to go around and shake hands with some of the Vets there, and say to them that I appreciate their service. Every last one of them took time to tell me how much that meant to them.

I was in high school when Vietnam broke loose. I had classmates who served. I had three cousins who served. One had 3 tours in Nam, and Lew, George and Skip – I’ve never taken the time to tell you how proud I am of each of you and how much I appreciate your service. I still have your Service photos!

When someone asked me today for my impressions of yesterday’s event, I shared with him that i have vivid memories of the protests, and the turbulence of the time. But most importantly, I carry with me the deep regret that the men and women who served in Vietnam were not given a heroes welcome – many were spat on as they returned. They were made the scapegoats and treated like criminals. We can’t change that part of our history, but we can heal it, and help them to heal by expressing our appreciation to them today. They deserve closure. They deserve acknowledgement for their sacrifice. Many still carry the psychological wounds of what they witnessed over there, and what they experienced back here.

Whether or not I may agree or disagree with the reasons for being there, I know this. Most of our young people serve out of a sense duty, a desire to protect, to defend. They buy the image on posters with the perfect dress uniforms. (Maybe we should have posters with blood-stained fatigues and missing body parts.) They learn to follow orders, going where they are told and doing what they believe they must do.

I am not one who supports our politician’s fervor for armed conflict. We send our babies to kill other people’s babies while the decision makers sit comfortably in their homes. In traditional Indigenous Cultures, the Chiefs are who take to the battlefield first. People call them “savages.” (I say who is more savage? Leaders who take responsibility and lead from the front, or those who hide and treat their people as “expendables?”)

The point is this – today when I encounter a person in uniform or a veteran, especially a Vietnam Vets, I make it a point to approach them, stick out my hand and express appreciation for their service. In almost every instance, they a touched and grateful for the acknowledgement.

There’s a lot of “walking wounded” (no pun intended) still out there and we have the ability to help them heal.

Welcome Home Veterans!

©2015 Deborah Adler and Silverstream Corporation. All rights reserved. (NOTE: ALL quotes and/or materials from other authors or sources remain the sole property of the original authors/source.)

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Opportunities for Spiritual Growth

8 Nov

There are some people that I hang out with on a regular basis, and they are for the most part a very lively, fun-loving, life-celebrating group of people who have reason to celebrate every day as a gift – they have come to the other side of addiction and are living free one day at a time.

No one is perfect. Each individual is at their own stage of personal and spiritual development. There are no formal leaders – leadership rotates through volunteers. All that guides these people is a set of “Traditions.” When adhered to, these Traditions have been capable of dissolving perceived differences, “real” or imagined, and allowed people from all walks of life, various religious or non-religious beliefs, diverse social-cultural-political backgrounds come together in a common focus for the good of all. This fellowship extends around the globe  – in practically every country in the world.

With all that being said, Humans are still going to be Humans – and in those moments, may provide what one of my friends likes to describe as a “wonderful opportunity for spiritual growth.”

I have been given one such opportunity lately as a result of my relocation to a fairly small town in Arizona that shall remain unnamed because I do believe in “Principles before Personalities” and the particulars are really incidental to the larger picture and lessons learned.

Having come from a fairly urban setting, I can honestly say I really wasn’t prepared for such a sequence of events – “my bad” as the kids say.  But shortly after I arrived and began participating in the local meetings of this fellowship, one woman found it necessary to delve into my life’s details and felt she had discovered something for which she feels justified in judging me. (See previous post “On Gossip Mongering and the Truth”)

This woman has become a one-person vigilante movement determined to carry her message to everyone who will listen. Fortunately, those people she had approached are practicing the Principles outlined in the Traditions in all their affairs and have rejected her efforts to stir up controversy.

Now, to put this all in perspective, I’m talking about people from all walks of live, who have come back from some of the roughest, rawest experiences in life – ex-cons, prostitutes, thieves, and people who if not on such a drastic level have still cheated themselves and others in the name of being ruled by their addictions prior to recovery.  So who do you think is going to “cast the first stone?”

To add to my frustration, the allegations being made by this woman are not truthful – but have you ever tried to fight against lies? It’s a lot like shadow boxing. You can wear yourself out trying and never get anywhere!

So I have continued to attend the meetings and much to my delight, some “Real” people have stepped up and without directly addressing this person, have definitely addressed the issue of judgment and “singleness of purpose during the discussions and afterward.”

One thing I know is that whenever I look this woman in the eye, she looks away. “Pray for her” would be the advice of my spiritual mentors. And I am.

It’s been interesting and I’m not sure she’s done or just resting…but I know that I have to stay in the now and appreciate the sanity I feel surrounded by from those who have stepped up lovingly to let me know that they don’t give a rat’s ass about gossip or anyone’s background – real or imaginary.

Stay tuned.

-Deb Adler

 

 

 
©2014 Deborah Adler and Silverstream Corporation. All rights reserved. (NOTE: ALL quotes and/or materials from other authors or sources remain the sole property of the original authors/source.)

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A Second Chance for Kindness

29 Mar

One of my favorite expressions is “Kindness doesn’t cost…and you never know whom it might save.”

Well, today “kindness” cost $3.14 – but the lesson was priceless.  I share this because we seldom get a second chance to do something good, or “right.”

I stopped into a fast food restaurant to grab a coffee before going over to the dentist’s office to get 2 teeth extracted. A woman walked in and asked the Manager if she had an extra roll of toilet paper. The Manager looked confused and asked if it was needed in the restroom – and the woman told her, no, she was just wondering if they could afford to give her a roll of toilet paper.  The Manager, of course, said no, and then she and the other counter staff laughed after the woman left.

I watched the woman once she got outside.  She seemed confused.  She went up to cars, presumably trying to see if anyone was in there.  I watched to see if she connected with anyone, but she didn’t. I started to go outside, but hesitated and then she left.

I walked over to the dentist office, regretting that I hadn’t gone out to speak with her.  Shortly after I signed in at the front desk, the woman walked in asking the same question.  Again the same scenario repeated itself. The receptionist seemed puzzled at the question and then told her they couldn’t give her any.  The woman turned dejected and walked out. The chatter started amongst the other people waiting as well as the office staff at the front.  I got up and told the receptionist that I would be right back.

There happened to be a drug store next door.  I called out to the woman, and asked her to come over to me.  I asked her name – Dianne. I asked if she had a job, which she didn’t.  She was on SSI. She had kids. I told her to come inside the drugstore with me.  We went back to the paper goods and I bought her a package of toilet paper.  She thanked me.

When we got outside she started to cry. She wanted to tell me about a man who was “breaking her heart” – and apparently took her assistance check the day before.  I gently  told her that I needed to get back to my appointment and then walked away.

Then I turned around and called out to her again. “You deserve better,“ I said to her. “Just remember,  God loves you and you deserve better.”  She smiled tearfully and we both turned around and walked away.

Any time we allow ourselves to invest even a few moments in another person’s life – we walk away a better person – not because of what we do, but because of what/who we allow to touch us.

She came to me twice. We don’t always get a “second chance” – guess Creator knows how guarded I can be! Glad I listened the second time.

It’s been a good day.  (Even if I did get some teeth pulled!)

-Deb Adler

DISCLAIMER: All the opinions expressed in any articles, blog posts and Internet content written by me are my own and do not reflect the opinions or beliefs of any individuals or organizations with whom I associate.

©2012 Deborah Adler. All rights reserved. (NOTE: ALL quotes and/or materials from other authors or sources remain the sole property of the original authors/source.)

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3 Weeks and Counting

2 Apr

“I define joy as a sustained sense of well-being and internal peace – a connection to what matters.” Oprah Winfrey

Three weeks ago I attended a Women’s Expo. I was there as an exhibitor helping to staff a booth. We had a fairly good turn out both days and I managed to talk with a lot of people. I came away with ten solid leads, three of which have already led to sales.

I also received a gift on the second and final day of the Expo. One of the other exhibitors had carnations that she has been giving out to the attendees. As the event was drawing to a close and fellow exhibitors began taking our displays down, she came around to give away the remaining carnations she had.

I got a beautiful white carnation. I carefully protected it amongst the several things I had to carry out with me and when I arrived back at my place I cut the long stem down and placed her in a tall jar I had for just such an occasion. Then I placed her in on my desk in front of my computer keyboard (where I spend most of my time!).

I am amazed to say that she is still vibrant, still fresh standing upright in her glass. I’ve freshened the water twice and even wiped off a little slim that looked like it was forming at her base.

I feel like I have a new friend. I have spoken my appreciation for her beauty and gifting to me from day one. She seems remarkably resilient. She evens smells like a carnation. One thing I have noticed to my disappointment is that so man flowers now-a-days don’t smell any more – which is sad.

My Father used to gift my Mother and I with gardenia corsages for special occasions. They were so fragrant and beautiful. Their fragrance graced the house for many days afterward.

Maybe this sounds like a lot of fuss over one flower. But I feel a connection to this Being. It was, after all, taken from its connection to the Earth, thus cut off from its nourishment and life support. Still, she has survived and gifted me not only its beauty and strength but a sense of companionship. Every time I look at her, I get the sense that I’m looking at a special Messenger.

So I celebrate my Friend, the Carnation, today. I will enjoy however many more days we have together because I have come to appreciate that there are no coincidences; Life is a Gift and comes in many different forms, and Appreciation is the key to a rich and joyous experience here. – Deborah Adler

“The Old One said, ‘All life resonates from our existence. The universe is our outer body. All is connected.’ This has been an echo that has been at the heart of a life time of seeking and exploring being Human. How and what does it mean to be human? Like the subatomic level of atoms and electrons that are the base of all matter and form, Man is such in the Cosmos.” –Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha,  from The Body as an Altar*

*© Copyright 2005 POL; © Copyright 2007 Parisha Online. All Rights Reserved



 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

DISCLAIMER: All the opinions expressed in any articles, blog posts and Internet content written by me are my own and do not reflect the opinions or beliefs of any individuals or organizations with whom I associate.

©2011 Deborah Adler. All rights reserved. (NOTE: ALL quotes and/or materials from other authors or sources remain the sole property of the original authors/source.)

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7%

27 Dec

I received the following inspiration from my second cousin, Sue, who sends many inspirational emails out to her family and friends every day. She is one of my “Sunshine People” whom I count amongst my many blessings. No matter what her circumstances in her own life, Sue finds funny and inspirational stories and takes the time to share them with others.

Through Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha, my spiritual mentor and Elder of over 25 years, I have come to realize that we are the ones who determine the quality of our lives, and whether the “drama” we are playing out is “tragedy” or “comedy.”

In Ancient Futures: Times Before Time by Pa’Ris’Ha she writes, “Resolve judgments and issues and do not allow them to take more precious time in your life. Saying “yes” to the universe and getting on with empowerment is seeing what must change and doing it. Life then becomes fun and the transformation is exciting and rewarding instead of heavy and sad.”

Oprah Winfrey shares: “My philosophy is that not only are you responsible for your life, but doing the best at this moment puts you in the best place for the next moment.”

Essentially the message is this: We have the power to determine how what we experience affects us. If we determine to be “cause” in our lives, then we will see opportunity is all that comes our way. That starts with a decision of right thinking. I can be a victim, a pawn, or I can be Co-Creator.

The column below was written by Regina Brett, columnist for a northeastern newspaper and host of her own talk show “The Regina Brett Show” every on WKSU 89.7 FM, Northeast Ohio’s NPR affiliate. She is a cancer survivor who, after reaching 50 years added 5 more “Lessons Life Taught Me.” It shares some great ways to create beauty and joy in our lives and, as one of my favorite actresses, A.J. Cook, commented recently on her own gracious handling of being axed from a popular series in which she was starring, “Taking the high road.”

Here’s the text of the email:

This is something we should all read at least once a week!!!!! Make sure you read to the end!!!!!!

“To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me. It is the most requested column I’ve ever written.

1. Life isn’t fair, but it’s still good.

2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.

3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.

4. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.

5. Pay off your credit cards every month.

6. You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

7. Cry with someone. It’s more healing than crying alone.

8. It’s OK to get angry with God. He can take it.

9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.

10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.

11. Make peace with your past so it won’t screw up the present.

12. It’s OK to let your children see you cry.

13. Don’t compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn’t be in it.

15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don’t worry; God never blinks.

16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.

17. Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.

18. Whatever doesn’t kill you really does make you stronger.

19. It’s never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.

20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don’t take no for an answer.

21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don’t save it for a special occasion. Today is special.

22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.

23. Be eccentric now. Don’t wait for old age to wear purple.

24. The most important sex organ is the brain.

25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.

26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words ‘In five years, will this matter?’

27. Always choose life.

28. Forgive everyone everything.

29. What other people think of you is none of your business.

30. Time heals almost everything. Give time.

31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

32. Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

33. Believe in miracles.

34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn’t do.

35. Don’t audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.

36. Growing old beats the alternative — dying young.

37. Your children get only one childhood.

38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.

39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.

40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’s, we’d grab ours back.

41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

42. The best is yet to come.

43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

44. Yield.

45. Life isn’t tied with a bow, but it’s still a gift.”


Its estimated 93% won’t forward this. If you are one of the 7% who will, forward this with the title ‘7%’.

I’m in the 7%. Friends are the family that we choose.

(End of email message).

Maybe you’re one of those people who find emails like this annoying. Personally, any time I can pass on inspiration to another, I’m grateful for the opportunity. I’m especially grateful for those who value our friendship enough to include me in their day with a touch of inspiration and joy!

Encouragement is something we can give to anyone. Living a rich life begins with sharing the wealth of our experience and appreciation.

“To live fully in Joy is Creator’s plan for us.”Pa’Ris’Ha

©2010 Deborah Adler. All rights reserved. (NOTE: all quoted material remains the property of the original authors. I claim no ownership).

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Reflections on the day after Christmas

26 Dec

Back to work this morning, and the natural question that came across the counter – both ways – was “How was your Christmas?”

Most people smiled and had positive comments. What I found remarkable were the two women – regulars – who came in at different times and each launched into quite a long diatribe about how they really hated Christmas and how hard this one was because of all the presents they had; all the waves of people coming at different times and the resultant cleanup.

“Wow,” I thought. “Really?”

I just sort of got busy getting their order ready. I listened but I didn’t give them any validation. I shared about going to a Seniors’ Home and singing.

When you’re working a register at a restaurant counter you have to maintain a delicate balance of what you can say to people because they’re “regulars” and you get to know them better, and restrictions that fall under the “the customer is always right” clause.

Some days I feel more like a confessional, which I suppose is good from the standpoint that it shows a degree of trust. But then I’ve had total strangers open up and tell me their entire life story at a bus stop. Plus a lot of people seem to think I’m a Nun – so who knows?

But what I really wanted to ask those two ladies was “Did you know that there were kids writing to the Macy’s Santa this year asking for food, and clothes – or jobs for their parents – and you’re complaining because you had so much to clean-up from too many gifts?”

But I just bagged up their food, smiled and wished them a good day.

This evening I was reading a blog post from one of my associates with the Learning Center for Human Development, Lois. She shared about the joys of cleaning up after the Christmas chaos, about the good feeling of bringing things back into order. Loved it! See: AppreciatingLife: Clean Up

I remember many Christmas mornings at my Aunt Grace’s house in Easton, PA. Their little dog, Sally, had a ball tearing through the wrapping paper all over the floor, and we all just sat around after the last present was opened watching this little bundle of fur have the time of her life tunneling under and racing all around the many colored balled up and crumpled sheets of paper. My Uncle Buster would add to her joy by burying her in the sheets just as she emerged up through them! Then when she had finally exhausted herself, we all pitched in to pick up the remnants and the kids went down to the basement to play at the pool table while the adults moved on to helping with the holiday dinner preparations.

Talk about waves of people coming through the door – we had twenty to thirty during the day, all walking through the door at various times throughout the day to recreate the original scene of opening presents and watching Sally go crazy all over again.

Creating our own experience is a practice that has been validated from philosophers, coaches, motivational speakers, successful business people, to Quantum Physicists.

It begins with deciding what we want and then utilizing visualization, journaling, and positive “self-speak” that reinforces the vision.

Like attracts Like. That’s another scientific Principle. What’s been discovered is that it applies to the relationship between how we think, feel and the type and quality of life we live.

Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha, my spiritual mentor and Elder has said, “The key to open your life is absolute appreciation for everything in your life.”

Oprah Winfrey has said “I know for sure that what we dwell on is who we become.”

Both women reinforce what science is now revealing to us in many ways has been reflected in the old, old adage: “When you look at glass containing water half way up – do you see a glass half empty or half full?”

As long as I look upon life with appreciation, as I have learned by observing Grandmother Pa’Ris’Ha, and open myself to receive by giving of myself, I will see/create a glass that is filling up and overflowing with blessings!

©2010 Deborah Adler. All rights reserved.

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